Letter of a different kind
by purplelogicwriter
Summary: The prompt was "I want to see Sharon Beck gone for good." With that in mind this is what I came up with. One shot.


**A/N: A guest reviewer passed this prompt to me. So thank you guest for giving me something new to write. As always I hope y'all enjoy, and if you ever want to see a story written let me know. The prompt was I want to see Sharon Beck gone for good. With that in mind this is what I came up with.**

They had closed their case, and all that was left was for the evidence to be catalogued and the reports to be filed. She looked at her watch. They could finish this up Monday, she decided, mainly because she was ready to get out of there too. Just as she was about to get up to give them the good news, there was a knock on her office door. "Come in." She had been expecting one of her Lieutenants, but to her surprise it was a uniformed officer that she hadn't seen before. He was wavering in the doorway looking a little unsure. In the background, she could see her team watching the man with an odd curiosity. "Yes officer?" she prompted.

"Captain, there was a woman downstairs that dropped this off for you." She realized the officer was holding an envelope.

'_Great, just what I need,' she thought._ She had a newfound hatred of letters that were hand delivered. The last time she had gotten letters her youngest son was almost killed.

She held out her hand, "Thank you officer," she took a minute to read his nametag, "Reagan." He quickly crossed the small space to her desk and handed it to her.

"You're welcome ma'am," he said quickly exiting the office.

She wondered who the woman that dropped it off was. The handwriting on the envelope was clear and neat; she assumed that this same woman had probably written the letter. Lieutenant Flynn was now standing in her open doorway. She raised an eyebrow, "Something that I can help you with Lieutenant?"

"What did he want?"

She thought his words were laced with a hint of protectiveness, but she didn't need to be protected. Their relationship out of work was…complicated, to say the least, but at work they had agreed to maintain their professionalism. "Officer _Reagan_ was just delivering something that was dropped off for me," she said waving the letter. She didn't really want to discuss it because she had no idea what the letter contained. She decided to change the subject, "Why don't you let the rest of the team know to wrap it up. We can finish up on Monday." She had made sure her tone was light but dismissive all the same.

"Yeah, sure I'll do that."

Alone again, she contemplated the letter, but instead threw it in her purse gathering the rest of her things. Rusty would be home soon, and she wanted to be there. Lately they had been passing like ships in the night, and she missed their time together.

* * *

><p>As he pulled into the parking garage, he was surprised to see that Sharon's car was already there. It made him smile reflexively. He hadn't really seen Sharon all week, and there were some things that he really needed to discuss with her. He hurried to the condo. The second he came through the door the aroma of tomato sauce hit him. <em>'She's cooking?'<em>

When Sharon left work early and came home cooking it meant one of two things. She either wanted to talk about something that she knew he didn't, or something really bad had happened. He figured the former was more likely. He quietly closed the door setting down his bag in the process. He obviously wasn't quiet enough because she popped her head around the corner saying, "Hey."

"You're cooking?" He knew his tone was a little skeptical so he followed it with what he thought was a comfortable smile.

"I am," she said disappearing back into the kitchen. He didn't like the way those words sat with him.

He bent down to retrieve his bag and take it to his room, but he noticed there was a letter on the table next to her purse. It didn't look out-of-place, but it was the writing on it that had caught his attention. The way that _Sharon_ was written in Captain Sharon Raydor was exactly how his mom wrote her name. He sat his bag down again, and grabbed the letter rushing to the kitchen. His hurried movements must have startled her because she turned around abruptly with a concerned look on her face.

"Sh-Sharon where did you get this?" He suddenly felt sick and a little wobbly.

Sharon set the spoon down she was holding, and she put her hand on his arm in order to steady him. "It was dropped off down stairs at the station, and delivered to me by an officer. Why?"

He shook his head in disbelief. If it was hand delivered that meant she was out of jail. What was he supposed to tell Sharon? _My mom wrote you a letter, and I know that because of the handwriting._ No. Okay. Sharon already knew something was wrong. Why had his mother written her a letter, and not him, and why hadn't she told him she was out of jail?

"Rusty, Rusty look at me."

It was in that moment, he realized he had been staring at the letter he was cradling to his chest. He brought his eyes up to meet hers. She was calm, and some of that rubbed off on him. It was enough that he was able to form words again, even if they didn't come out in complete sentences. "It's from… the handwriting… it's just." But she stopped him by putting her hand up.

"Honey stop. Take a breath ok." He did as instructed, and she took the letter out of his hand putting it on the counter. "Now, tell me what is going on."

He took another breath. "It's from my mom." He couldn't look at her anymore so he just stared at the ground. She released his arms and stood up straight, realization hitting her.

"It's her handwriting, that's what you were trying to say," she said quietly.

He finally looked up at her, and the look she was giving him was enough to make him want to run to his room. She was always so caring and loving and he didn't know how she did it. He had been nothing but trouble for her, and she had still adopted him. She knew almost everything about him, and she was still standing right in front of him loving him. "Yeah, it's her handwriting." There was a look of acknowledgement, and she turned back to the stove to pull the sauce off. He knew that she knew what the implication was. His mother was out of jail.

He didn't know what to do now that she had turned around. There were questions and things that he wanted to say, but none of them seemed like the right thing to say in that moment. He just stood there watching her make their plates, and then he decided to make the drinks. When they finally sat down at the table she started the conversation, "I didn't know."

He knew that she was talking about his mother being out of jail. "You didn't open it. Why not?"

She looked like she was choosing her words carefully. "I am still a little apprehensive when it comes to hand delivered letters."

That was something that he definitely understood. "Are you going to read it?"

She took a bite, and he looked at his food. It smelled delicious, but he didn't know if he could eat it right then. "I think that you should read it," he said when she didn't answer. If she read it then she would tell him what it said. Then again, maybe he didn't want to know.

"I will read it," she said softly.

He knew there was no point in rushing her. Sharon had her reasons for everything that she did. Sometimes he didn't understand them, but he had learned not to question them. "Will you tell me?" She would never lie to him, and he knew that.

"I promise."

He decided to try to eat.

* * *

><p>The second that she realized what he was talking about her stomach had done cartwheels. Rusty was so upset, and how could she have left the letter just sitting around. Given, she didn't know that it was from Ms. Beck, but still she should have been a little more careful. Their history with letters wasn't great.<p>

Now she was sitting there watching him eat, and she found it extremely difficult to even talk about the subject. All she had been able to say was that she would read it. It wasn't even about the letter; it was the fact that his mother was out of jail and probably angling to make some grand entrance back into his life.

Things had changed and she had adopted Rusty, and they were in a good place. Now all of a sudden she felt like she might lose him. She knew that was a foolish thought, but it had always been there hiding in the back of her mind.

As she brought herself out of her thoughts, she realized that Rusty was in the kitchen cleaning up. She hadn't even realized that he had gotten up from the table. She needed to get her act together. She stood up and took his place cleaning up saying, "I can clean up." Cleaning was her therapy, and she desperately needed to do something.

He went back to the table to grab the napkins and their glasses. She knew it was coming when he said, "When do you think you will read it?"

She wasn't sure. The thought had crossed her mind about two seconds ago to just rip it open and get it over with. Instead, she dried her hands and grabbed the letter, and with Rusty in-tow she headed for the living room. She sat on the couch while he opted for the chair right across from her. She opened the letter, and schooled her face. The last thing she needed was for her face to give something away before they knew what they were facing.

_Captain Raydor, _

_I spent the majority of my time over the past year hating and despising you, but today walking free on the street I understand. I realize that you didn't keep me in county that year for my benefit, but for Rusty's instead. You kept me where he could see me if he wanted. Thank you for that. _

_The day he told me about the adoption I hated you even more, but I realize now that you were giving him something that I couldn't, you gave him a family. _

_We have our differences, but the thing you are better at seems to be taking care of him. So, take care of him, and help him understand why I am leaving. The second page of this letter is for him, and I trust you will give it to him. I love him, but you're his mom now. This is for him._

_Sharon Beck_

No. No. No. This was all wrong. She was gone. Sharon Beck was leaving her son again. She flipped the page, and it was very short.

_Rusty,_

_I'm sorry for all that I put you through. _

_Love, _

_Me_

She didn't even sign it _mom_. This was not happening. She brought her eyes up to Rusty's and he was watching her every move with wide eyes. She wasn't sure that she hadn't let her face slip, and she knew better than to trust her voice, so she just looked at him before folding the letter back up. She wasn't ready to let him read it just yet.

"S-Sharon," his voice was laced with uncertainty.

She pulled her glasses off of her face and laid them on the end table. Their relationship was solid now, and they had gone through so many things. She told herself that this would just have to be one more thing that they got through together.

"I'm going to let you read both of them, but Rusty," her voice hitched a little, "I am here, and I'm not going anywhere." That was all she could do until she saw his reaction. She could only reassure him of those words she had said so long ago, _I am here,_ and all she could hope for was that he wouldn't shut down.

She handed him the letters.

* * *

><p>He knew it was bad the second Sharon had said, "I am here." Those were the infamous words that had changed their relationship. He knew she would always be there for him now, but there were times when the doubt still crept in. He was legally her son and he knew what that meant to her, and it meant the world to him, but if she was worried then he knew he wouldn't like what he was about to read.<p>

He sat there holding the letters in his hand, but he couldn't take his eyes off of Sharon. She gave him a look that he knew was meant to be reassuring but did little to actually accomplish its mission, and then she nodded. He took a breath and began to read.

He made it through the first paragraph. Then, he read the second one. He knew what was coming, and as hard as he fought it the tears still came to his eyes. As he read the last one, the tears began to fall. He tried to spin the chair away from Sharon, but she caught it putting her hand on his leg. There were tears in her eyes too. He was pissed, and he wanted to lash out at her, but he bit his tongue. He hadn't had those feelings in a long time, and now they were bubbling up. He knew it wasn't her fault, and he wasn't going to hurt her like he used to.

He flipped the page, and there were so few words on it. He read them over and over. _Love, Me_. That's all she could say to him, really. Really.

"She got one thing right." The words were out of his mouth before he had really thought about them. Sharon's hand was still on his leg, and she withdrew it at his words. That was not what he wanted. He got up from the chair thinking that he was going to start pacing, but instead he sat down on the couch next to her with their shoulders touching. He wiped the tears from his face. "She said you're my mom now."

Sharon turned to look at him, and the lump in his throat got bigger, he couldn't say anything else. He wiped his eyes again, and Sharon finally spoke. "You were my son far before this." Only Sharon would say something like that.

"I'm never going to see her again." The realization hit him, and it hurt. Even if she came back at some point he would never want to see her again.

He felt Sharon's arms go around him and his went around her instinctively. He knew that everything would be okay because they had each other.


End file.
